Stupid questions

Since the Christmas time I have been really annoyed by the stupid questions people tend to ask.
For example you are shopping in a supermarket and pump into a friend there, and he/she asks "Oh, what are you doing here?" Really? What do you think I'm doing? Playing chess with flamingos, that's what.

Or when someone is at your place and asks "Why is this thing in there?"
Well, if you are at my place then the logic says that it is in there because I put it there.
It is impossible for me not to be sarcastic in these situations and answer something totally ridiculous, like "Well, the spiders came in and met the superman who was turned into spider man and then they all played hopscotch, and .. well then they put it in there" 

And the classical stupid question "Do you smoke?"
Do you see me smoking at the moment, well then I do.
If you don't see me smoking at the moment then I am sot smoking at the moment.
For some reason people want to know for sure the box where to put you in, are you a smoker or a non-smoker and the "I smoke when I want to smoke... and it might be right now ..or also it might be never" is not sufficient enough. 

Oh sweet irony that the expression "rational thinking" was coined by humans.

Cheers!